Tuesday, October 11, 2016

A New World of Horror...and Smelling Salts

   This is sort of a re-post of stuff I had on my Cover Reveal party for Ambulatory Cadavers. It introduces the world of Monezuela were the book takes place.

   Ambulatory Cadavers is my new horror comedy novella, coming October 31!
   Blurb:
   Two cousins. One on the verge of a great discovery—and excessive power, wealth, and infamy—the other on the verge of an odious marriage.
Lyra will stop at nothing to achieve her father’s dream of dissolving Parliament into so much anatomical sludge, searching out the farthest reaches of science and the arcane arts. Until her own dreams begin to awaken, jolted by the electric sparkle of an artist’s eyes.
Alice’s worst nightmares begin to awaken as great expectations weigh upon her and her answer to a very important question is awaited. Lacking a strong constitution, Alice can only run from her problems—until she runs into a strange young man of questionable occupation and discovers her cousin’s terrible plans.
The dead are about to rise, the Lords are about to fall, and things are about to get creamy. And high society will never be the same again.


   Bamberg…the ripest nest of vipers in all Monezuela. In all the world, in fact. I created Bamberg as the setting of my own barber tragedy after watching Tim Burton’s Sweeney Todd, the Demon Barber of Fleet Street. It became the home of many wild tales of darkness and crime. And ridiculously foolish and fashion-prone individuals. I knew that someday I would write about this place, this notorious city and the country of which it is capital: a land without a continent, an un-sunk Atlantis. I did not know that this day would come so soon.
   Bamberg was just waiting to have a story slapped down in its winding streets and catacombs and slums and elaborate parks. So where else could I put the walking dead when they came ambulating across my laptop screen?
   I actually already have an unpublished story lurking around somewhere that was meant to be set in Bamberg, but I don’t think I use the name. At any rate, I think Ambulatory Cadavers is a much better introduction into this comical hive of wickedness. It will ease us gently into this world, a world that really was still somewhat undefined and foggy. We will spend quite a bit of time out in the countryside near the city before diving into the streets and the bloodshed that will ensue.

   Are you ready to follow me into Monezuela and Bamberg? Keep a close eye on your pocket book, your china, your unmentionables and your relatives.



   Review of Ambulatory Cadavers by Mr. Harold B. Farthingale for the Bamberg Daily Discharge

   This is a highly disgusting work of fiction. Hysterical and lewd, it depicts obscene violence in a cavalier manner and plays with words as if they were of no consequence. The characters display little or no remorse for their hideous actions and fall in love with unrealistic candidates. This is sure to give impressionable young people a distorted outlook on life and morals and fill their heads with complete nonsense. 
   Furthermore, blue kissing is metaphorically described in vivid detail and decapitation is portrayed with gruesome and callous abandon. This type of sensational writing is neither skillful nor of remote value. It is frivolous and wicked and should not be purchased, borrowed or hidden beneath stockings in bureau drawers



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